Dealing With a Narcissist

Technology makes it so much easier for narcissists to manipulate through triangulation. It can be as simple as liking a comment from an old ex, while ignoring one from you. He will “accidentally” upload a photo album where he’s embracing the ex he once claimed to hate. Everything appears to be unintentional—you often attribute it to insensitivity— but make no mistake: it is carefully calculated.

He will post strategically ambiguous statuses, songs, and videos that suggest you might be “losing” him. He will share things that are intentionally meant to lure in new & old targets. For example, an inside joke with his new victim. Or the love song that he and his ex once shared. This does two things: it leaves you feeling unhinged, anxious, and jealous. But it also makes the competing party feel confident, loved, and special. He is grooming them as he erodes your identity—two birds with one stone.

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